Extraordinary (and funny) answers of Shaykh ibn Al-Uthaimeen

From MM

For me this is a great example of how becoming scholarly and more “religious” should cultivate and properly direct a person’s sense of humor, and not eradicate it completely. It’s very strange for me to see people getting more into Islam and becoming overly serious and having boring personalities. May Allah (swt) bless the Sheikh with the highest levels of Firdous. 

Extraordinary answers of Sh Al-Uthaimeen (Translated for MM by ibn Dhakir)

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Questioner: Shaikh, my question is: About the young lady who has not reached adulthood, what is the ruling with regards to the following three situations: covering the face outside the house? And wearing pants in any form, situation, or reason? And the khimar in the Salah?

Answer: This man is intelligent. He combined three questions in one, may Allah forgive us and him….

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Questioner: Is it allowed for a man to be with his female servant, and what can see of her?

Answer: If he marries her, then she can uncover her face in front of him, and this is the solution…. But I am afraid that if she becomes his wife, she will demand a female servant, and then this will be a problem!

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Questioner: Is it allowed for me to buy a rooster so that when it crows, I ask Allah of His bounty?

Answer: I don’t know about this! It’s ordained for a person that when he hears the crowing of a rooster that he ask Allah of His bounty, but I am afraid that your rooster will be silent! Alhamdulillah, you ask Allah for His bounty if you hear the rooster or not! Ask of His bounty always.

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Questioner: Shaikh, may Allah reward you with paradise. Many nights I see in my dreams as if I’m sitting in your class! I have certain questions, so I ask you and you give me the answer! So what’s the ruling with regards to those answers? [Questioner laughs]

Answer: I don’t remember this! I don’t remember this! I don’t notice in my sleep that you are asking me anything! [Shaikh laughs] Don’t depend on this. If you listen to a tape, that’s fine, but we don’t give lessons to those who are sleeping!

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Questioner: In the hadith: [There is no competition except in shooting arrows, foot-racing, or horse-racing] So what is your opinion if someone engages in rooster-racing or pigeon-racing?

Answer: Look, the Prophet SAWS said: [There is no competition except in shooting arrows, foot-racing, or horse-racing] , because these things are used in war. If your rooster is used in war so that you ride on it, then it’s allowed! Otherwise no….

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Question: What is your opinion about these duas which are put in the car, like the dua for riding, the dua for traveling, etc. What’s the response to those who say that they are amulets?!

Answer: Amulets! I say that whoever says they are amulets are telling the truth, if the car is sick! The duas are attached to the car, not the rider, and to put them in the car is fine since the remind the riders for the dua for riding or traveling. Everything that helps to do good is good. There is no problem, and they are not amulets! Unless if someone said to you: If the car is sick, attaching the duas to it will cure it by the will of Allah!

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On the issue of killing a locust at the Haram

The Shaikh asked a student about the issue of killing a locust at the Haram since Allah SWT said: [the compensation is an offering, of a domestic animal equivalent to the one he killed] {Al-Maida 5:95}.

So the Shaikh said to the student: What is the closest thing to a locust?

The student said: A camel! [The shaikh laughed and all the students laughed as well]

Then the Shaikh jokingly corrected the student saying: The horse is the closest thing to a locust. So if he killed four locusts, he must give a horse for each locust!

The students were all shocked [and the narrator of the story mentions he was shocked as well because he did not know that the shaikh would joke]

Some of the students said, surprised: He then has to give four horses.

Then the shaikh laughed, rahimahullah.

Then he described the ruling: “The scholars say that the locust is a game animal, and it is prohibited to hunt it. But it has no domestic animal similar to it, so the penalty for killing it in the Haram is its price. If its price is 10 Riyals, or even one Riyal, he must give that price in Sadaqa. And these days it has no price whatsoever.

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[The narrator mentions] :

I asked the shaikh about the ruling of a woman looking at a man. (His view was that it is allowed if there is no fitna). I debated with him for a long time on the issue, and afterwards when I wanted to leave he said: Where are you going? The question seemed a little strange to me, so I laughed and said I’m going out. He said: Wear a khimar so the women don’t see you!

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The shaikh mentioned in the book of Hajj, at the end of the chapter on Mawaqeet:

“If he travels in the air and comes parallel to the meeqat he must put on the Ihram. Shaikhul Islam Ibn Taymiya said that it is not allowed for someone in the airplane to put on the ihram or to delay the Ihram until he lands. He said that the individual must wear the Ihram when he is parallel to the meeqat”

The students were shocked at this statement and wondered how it could be possible.

The Shaikh said that he was speaking about the magicians who would lie to the people and say: We will have the angels carry you to Makkah in one day, and we will go to Arafah in one day. He said they would err because the shayateen would carry them above the meeqat while they would not put on the Ihram. And this is exactly the same issue as the airplane.

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Questioner: What is the ruling on killing an insect in the Haram?

Shaikh: Which?

Q: What is the ruling on killing an insect in the Haram?

S: Like what?

Q: Like anything harmful!

S: LIke what?

Q: Like birds!

S: Birds! Pigeons?! The questioner asked about the ruling on killing insects in the haram, and I wanted an example, but he was unable to answer! And he said birds! Hmm …

Q: Anything!

S: Anything? Humans?!

Q: Humans?!!

S: You’re asking me?! You said anything!!

Q: Killing insects!

S: Like what?!!

Q: Like ants!

S: Ants?! I have never seen an ant in the Haram!! [Everyone laughs]

Q: I want the ruling!

S: Be specific. Now look – You just taught us that pigeons are insects!! [Everyone laughs, including the questioner]

Q: I have an example!

S: Which is?

Q: A mosquito

S: Mosquito, good….

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1 Comment

Filed under Character, Islam

One response to “Extraordinary (and funny) answers of Shaykh ibn Al-Uthaimeen

  1. Sameer

    oh man, these are hilarious, particularly the one about riding a rooster in a war….I can’t get that picture out of my head.

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